........"What about you?" she asked, smiling as she nibbled coquettishly at herstarter.I was lost for a moment. That sexiness again. Just over-powering. Sheneeded to tame that. Learn how to control her body language or it couldget her hurt.I was a Mistress yet I realised this kid was wrapping me around herpinkie finger. And, for now at least, out in the city for the first timein a year, I was happy to be there. Maybe one day I'd teach her if shewanted to learn, maybe she'd find her own way.......But for now, Iwanted to be nurtured.Selfish, considering Deborah's own circumstances, but she seemed verygiving."If I tell you and you go through that door, I can't undo what you findout," I began hesitantly. Actually nervously."Are you a spy?" she asked. "It sounds dangerous." Nothing so glamorous," I smiled. "Look, I haven't spoken about it for awhile. I'm a Mistress."She didn't miss a beat. "Cool."Kids, I thought. It was a whole new, accepting generation.I went further, sharing a little. It started in high school, in my senior year. I had turned eighteen on July 19th. I was well dressed, slender and popular, and my hair had just been straightened. I was looking better than I ever had. I should have been feeling good enough to match, but I wasn't. My self esteem was very low. Boys smiled at me just like with other girls, but then they moved on. Most girls that age fantasized about the captain of the football team, or the funny guy, or the super cool guy who always knew what to say. I fantasized about intellectuals. My math teacher was the hottest man on the planet!Within the first two weeks of school, a chess club was started. I found myself hanging out there, despite both my lack of knowledge and my lack of interest in the game. I just wanted to meet the boys who were playing. That's how I met Mike Brown. I feigned interest just so he would spend time teaching me to play when he wasn't playing someone else.We didn't have any money, so going out on dates just wasn't.
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